Cell Relay Archive

[YhvhBoy1YHVHBoT@eaTHLiNK.NeT]

YHVH in Paradise

I flew into Kauai and it didn't take very long to get going out of the 
airport.  I set out on foot, and it took a while just to get into town 
with all of the junk I had to tote around.  It was hot out, especially 
for February.  I was sweating.  People were honking at me when they 
drove by.  I Finally got into town and I found a wal-mart there, and I 
met some kids there who were selling raffle tickets to win a kayak.  
I didn't buy one, but I asked them if they knew where I might be able to 
get a bag.  They told me they could hook me up, but that they would need 
to have money first.  I am pretty gullible, so I agreed.  Nobody showed back 
up, so I left later that night.  It was drizzling rain now, so I was 
getting a little wet.  My pants got the worst of it because I stepped 
through some puddles. I got a ways but decided I was really getting 
nowhere, and tired.  So I sat down and pondered my situation.  I watched 
a grasshopper trying to get across the road while all the cars were going 
through it.  Surprisingly, I related to that grasshopper.  I felt like I 
was that grasshopper in a way.  I watched the grasshopper and felt there 
was no hope for him.  At the same time I looked at my own self and thought 
there was no hope for me.  I felt lost and alone.  And wet.
But I watched.  I watched his journey unto the end, and he did make it 
across the road, though it took him some time.  So I decided I would also 
make it through my journey.  So I went across the road and stayed the night
with the grasshopper.  I put my sleeping bag down on the muddy earth and 
turned on my flashlight lantern to see what I was doing, and made ready for 
bed.  I woke up and walked back to wal-mart.  It wasn't open, so I 
walked around for a while.  I picked some grapefruit from a tree and had 
breakfast.  I walked around in a field behind there for a while, then came 
back to the store.

I bought some hiking boots later that day, because I 
decided I was going to get out of the cities while I was in Kauai.  I set 
off in the hot sun, and made my way toward what I thought was a natural 
setting, where I might be able to go explore a bit and see what nature 
really has to offer.  I unloaded some stuff from my pack and stowed it 
away in a place I figured I would remember if I came back and needed it.  
I walked more and again felt I was getting nowhere, but I pushed on.  I 
unloaded a tent Kristi's mom had given me.  I thought I would never use 
it and that it was extra baggage weighing me down.  I got to a waterfall, 
and there was a fence so that you couldn't go to it, you could only see it. 
But I found a break in the fence and continued on, now off of the road.
I took a break from walking for a bit, and stripped some of my clothes off, 
so I could clean off.  It was nice in the water, but it wasn't the cleanest 
water I have seen.  But I felt better than I did before getting into it.
I came back out of the water and got dressed, then continued on my journey. 
It was not long before I came to a road again, so I followed the road for 
a while.  The road cut between two sugarcane fields, but I didn't know it 
was sugarcane until someone explained it to me later.  An earwig landed on 
me, and it scared me.  Big black bugs with crescent ended tails, they look 
freaky.  Eventually I found a path to walk on.  It came to a stream, so I 
had to cross.  I took off my boots, and my feet were blistering from 
walking around in wet shoes the night before.  I hiked up my jeans and 
set out across the stream, hoping I would not fall and get everything I 
had wet.  There were large cement blocks under the water a bit downstream, 
so I used those to get across.  Then I kept walking without my shoes when I 
reached the other side.

I found a park somewhere later and I had to cross 
another stream to get to it.  There was a road across it, but it was 
slightly flooded.  I got across it, and I spent some time just resting in 
the park.  I hung out some of my stuff so that it could dry.  Someone gave 
me a lift to the other side again when I wanted to leave.  Later I came to 
a nice spot out in the woods.  There were some people there fishing.  
They offered to smoke some pot with me, and I accepted.  I used my chillum 
for the first time with them.  It was nice, it was fairly large and had a 
water chamber under the bowl.  Then I told them I should probably get 
going, and they gave me a sack.  I was grateful for them giving it to me.  
I didn't have much of anything to give them back, so I left a hacky sack 
for them to find on their way back.  I went up in the woods later and got 
undressed and smoked a bowl, trying to be more in touch with nature I guess.  
After a time I got dressed again and tried to find my way back to the path, 
but I lost my sense of direction, and was clueless to where it was.  
There were thick bushes there and I pushed my way through them.  I felt 
very confused and helpless, but I pushed on.  When I came to what seemed a 
wall of bushes, I had a vision of a city on the other side of them, and 
it was so real it was as if I could hear the people, smell the air of a 
city and so on.  So I went through and there I was back on the path.  
Then I had to figure out which direction I was facing.  I continued on, and 
I remember seeing this amazing tree with flowers covering it.  It was very 
beautiful to see.  Later on I found a dirt road that led down into a swampy 
place.  There wasn't much there except a broken down car.  I stayed there 
for a bit to relax from all the walking I had done.  I ate some fruit off 
of a tree there, I was getting pretty hungry.  I eventually left and came 
into a town later in the day.  I bought some food at a small grocery store
there.  I bought some beer too.  They didn't ask to see any identification, 
so I got it.  I fed some cows and retired myself in a park for the night.  
I ate and went to sleep.  No one bothered me for sleeping there, I was glad 
for that.  I still felt like I was intruding, so I left shortly after I 
woke up.

The next day, while I was walking some people stopped at the side 
of the road and asked me if I needed a lift.  I went with them.  They drove 
around for a bit, the wind felt good, I was riding in the back of their 
pickup.  We stopped at a restaurant for breakfast.  They introduced 
themselves to me, there was Charlie, he owned the truck, and YHVH, and 
another person whose name I do not recall who is a surfer.  Charlie told 
me that YHVH was a rabbi.  Charlie offered 
to pay for me to eat, but I told him I was fine.  I had enough money to buy 
food.  I had a fruit bowl to eat.  YHVH looked at me like He was very 
pleased with my choice.  Charlie offered some crab to us, I hesitated in 
accepting it, because it is "unclean," according to the kosher laws for 
food.  YHVH also tried some of Charlie's crab.  I had another fruit bowl 
after I was done eating mine.  Then we left the restaurant.  YHVH was 
asking me about rainbow gatherings and stuff like that.  I guess He figured 
me for a hippie.  Then before we took off again, He said to me, "I heard 
Jerry Garcia is still alive."  We went to the beach on the west side of 
the island.  They met some people on the way there, and talked to them 
for a while.  The road was very bumpy, and it was hard to sit, so I ended 
up standing in the back.  The ride was not the most pleasant I have had, 
but I made it in one piece, which I was glad for.  We eventually got to 
the beach, and YHVH gave me some sugar cane to eat.  We stayed there for 
a while.  Everyone else went out to the beach.  Charlie came back after a 
bit, and YHVH offered me a coconut.  
I had the milk, which I thought was very good.  It was the best coconut I 
have ever had.  Charlie explained to me, how when the meat inside can be 
spooned out with the tip of your fingernail, that it is ripe.  I have never 
had one like that again.

After Charlie was gone again, YHVH told me how 
He was a millionaire.  He also told me He has a house in Israel.  And 
this is the point at which I understood who YHVH really was.  He also told 
me that He got His degree at the university of Chicago.  Social sciences 
or something like that I believe is what He said.  Throughout the time I 
spent with YHVH and His 
friends, He kept singing the phrase, "All I wanna do,  is have some fun..." 
which is part of a Sheryl Crow song, but then He would say at the end of 
that phrase, "Just remember say YHVH is the One."  He said it over and 
over again.  And He kept talking about YHVHism to everybody.  YHVH took 
off His clothes after a while and went out to get some sunshine.  I was 
kind of surprised.  I guess I never saw anybody just take off their clothes 
in public before.  But I tried not to laugh or anything.  A little later 
I got out the sack that the people had given me earlier and started to 
roll a joint.  YHVH asked me, "Are you going to smoke a joint?"  I told 
Him that I was.  I offered it to Him, but He didn't want any.  He said 
something about only smoking the good stuff.  So I felt kind of bad about 
smoking it by myself.  And so later some friends of His showed up in 
another truck, and they brought some more pot.  I got out my chillum, 
and YHVH said to everyone, "This boy comes prepared."  I think He was 
impressed.  And we all smoked out of it.  
I was too high and couldn't control myself as well as I would have liked 
to, so I went up in the mountainside and sat by myself until I came down 
some.  I lost my glasses somewhere.  When I came back the surfer asked 
about what I did.  He said he saw me go up there.  Eventually they decide 
it is time to go back, so we get in the truck and leave.  We stopped at 
Dairy Queen and I ordered two rootbeer floats.  I was very hungry, and 
they filled me up.  Sometime during our stop at Dairy Queen YHVH asked me 
what brought me out to Kauai.  I told him that a `friend' told me to go 
there.  At this, YHVH said to the others, "This kid's got balls."  I was 
kind of embarassed.  Then we stopped somewhere so I could get some tobacco 
to smoke.  I got some Top tobacco, because that's what everyone else was 
smoking.

Charlie dropped YHVH and I off together, and YHVH drove us around 
for a while in His VolksWagen minibus.  Then we stopped to where another 
friend of His was living and He got me settled for the night.  It was an 
old school bus with all of the seats taken out, and there were a couple 
of beds there.  Before going to sleep I asked YHVH what I should do, and 
He said to me, "Go back home and tell everyone you met YHVH and converted 
to YHVHism."  
I felt really confused, I guess it was like "this is all I had to come here 
for?"  Well, anyways, I didn't have a plane ticket back home, so I had to 
figure out at least how to get back home.  Should I call my parents?  
Should I get a job?  "What do I do with myself now?"  I guess was what it 
felt like.  But I went to sleep and the next morning YHVH.  YHVH was on 
the trampoline early that morning, going around on it in circles.  He had 
some kind of stick in His hand that He was twirling around while He was 
jumping.  YHVH and his friend fed me bananas and passion fruit.  YHVH was 
talking about His clothes some time during that morning, and He said, 
"All my clothes are hemp... even my underwear."  Then we found Charlie, 
and the surfer, 
and we took off in YHVH's friend's truck.  YHVH dropped me off at a beach.  
It is called Secret's Beach.  He told Charlie, as if asking his advice, 
"Steve's a pretty good guy."  Then Charlie gave his half-approval, and 
YHVH told me, "Go find Steve."  So they left me there and took off again.

To Be Continued...

THiS WaS MY oRiGiNaL PaGe CReaTeD iN THe SPRiNG oF 1999.
i HaVe NoT uPDaTeD THe SToRY SiNCe THeN.
i HaD WRiTTeN SoMe oF THe CoNTiNuaTioN, BuT HaVe
NoT BeeN aBLe To FiND THe iNSPiRaTioN i NeeD
To CoNTiNue iT.
iF aNYoNe ouT THeRe iS iNTeReSTeD iN HeaRiNG THe ReST
PLeaSe CoNTaCT Me aT: YHVHBoY1@YaHoo.CoM